Sunday, July 10, 2016

Growing Pains

There is so much to say since I last updated this blog. 




So much life has been lived, shared, and enjoyed in the past 6 months that I have scarcely had time to think about it - much less write about it. Living one day at a time has been my all consuming purpose. The weight of additional responsibilities and challenges this year has kept me grounded and focused.


But today I'm intentionally stopping in the midst of the chaos swirling around me to acknowledge this season for what it is. 

It's been a season defined by growing pains. Inward, outward, and environmental growing pains.

I cling to the belief that the best kind of growth comes through pain. And therefore "pain" becomes not a negative concept to be avoided at all costs, but rather a gift to be embraced. Ask any wise person in your life where they learned their wisdom, and you will likely find the answer to have the same source: Pain. Hardship. Difficulty. 

Why this is - I don't yet know. All I know is that I'm growing - and its painful.

This year, I've purposed to face some of the inward realities of my past through counseling and have been learning to focus on who I am in the present. I'm leaning into who I am created to be, who God really is, and am slowly finding my way from endless striving to please others --towards finding rest and comfort in the sacred space within. It's been painful. Turns out there's a lot of accumulated shit in the spaces that were originally created sacred. And letting go of that shit is --well, a strangely freeing yet difficult thing to do. And so worth it. 

Outwardly, I've also experienced quite the growing pains this year. The growth of a beautiful new soul to share life with and the physical transformation associated with her arrival is perhaps the most beautiful analogy of growth through pain. Pregnancy, birth, sleep deprivation, and so many emotions. So much pain and joy and chaotic upheaval. And so worth it. 


Our shared living environment has also experienced growing pains.  

At this time, we are preparing to move out of our Shared Living home. The home we have shared with two women with developmental disabilities for the past two years and eight months. It's a bittersweet transition. We have no regrets from our time spent sharing life with Sarah, Jodi, and Acacia. It's been a deeply grounding and enlightening experience for us as a family and we will forever cherish these years, "the ladies", and all the memories we have formed together. It's been an even ratio of experiences ranging from challenging to joyous, mundane to exciting, and frustrating to hilarious. And so worth it. 


We are grateful to be leaving Sarah and Acacia in the loving hands of our good friends, Michelle and Chris Jones. They will be replacing us as caregivers starting August 1st. We are moving at the end of July into our own space in the nearby town of Issaquah. We are excited for this new season for all of us.  


Looking ahead, I am primarily excited about spending more time focusing on my two amazing children. I will continue to work with Community Homes on a part time basis as the coordinator of our five shared living homes in King County. I'm eager to stay involved with this housing model and help develop it further. Recruiting, training, and supporting caregivers will be my primary responsibilities - so if you know of any good candidates please send them my way! 


Meanwhile, Jesse has one year left in his graduate MBA program at Seattle University, and is thriving in his work at a local marketing firm. In his spare time he likes to write business plans for his dreams. As a family, we are looking forward to many more camping trips, soccer matches, and Pacific North West adventures in the days to come. In the next few months I will also be submitting my applications to graduate schools for fall of 2017. Stay tuned...the growth has only just begun!