We're at the beginning of something new. And we are SO grateful to be here. 2013 was a challenging year for our family as we struggled to find our feet after having moved across country, made the ongoing adjustment to parenthood, searched endlessly for better career options, and experienced some painful relationship breakdowns. We are hopeful that 2014 is a year of recovering and rebuilding. We are moving forward.
Forward movement has brought us to this point in our most recent adventure. Sharing life with two women who have down syndrome: Sarah and Jodi. They have beautiful souls, huge hugs, contagious laughter, and the most stubborn eyebrows you've ever met. My own surprisingly strong -and sometimes furrowed- brow has definitely found its soul-mate in these two.
It's been another whirlwind of a transition and I haven't had much down-time outside of a grocery store to reflect on what has all transpired in the past month. I've had a lot of friends asking what our new life is like so I want to take some time to answer that as honestly as possible while also aiding in my own processing. This is a brief summary of what we've been up to over the past couple of months. Perhaps someday I will have more insightful reflections of what I am learning and how I am changing through this, but for now, all I have are the raw facts.
We moved into our new home in the Seattle suburb of Bellevue on the first of December. Jesse was ridiculously busy at work that month due to being in retail during the holidays, but he somehow managed to do an incredible job of going above and beyond his work goals and help with this move. One step at a time was our inner monologue for this month. We really had to pull together as a team to get the massive amounts of work done that were before both of us. Setting up a home for people with disabilities is no small thing. Even after obtaining the proper certifications and licensing there is a ton of paperwork, various inspections, and endless communication needed with their case-workers, supervisors, job coaches, transportation, pharmacists, care-givers, and parents. All of this was pretty overwhelming at first.
Two weeks later, Sarah moved in. We had 5 days off for Christmas, during which we also celebrated our 6 year wedding anniversary in Victoria BC: a timely respite. Jodi moved in December 31st. Since then - and up until now - we have all been sick at one point or another. We shared a viral cold that put a couple of us on antibiotics. I think the stress of this major change plus the individual stresses we brought with us really did a number to our immune systems. I'm hopeful that we are at the end of this as the antibiotics near their end and Sarah and Jodi return to their regular work schedules.
Thankfully, both Sarah and Jodi's parents live nearby and are very helpful and supportive and do an INSPIRING job of loving their daughters well. We have felt very well supported and embraced as part of the broader family of Sarah and Jodi.
Now that the sickness has *mostly* passed, we are hoping to settle into a new routine and rhythm. On typical weeks - Sarah and Jodi leave home for 7 hours M-F for their work and day programs. The state of Washington is one of the most progressive in their care for people with disabilities and it thrills me to learn of so many AMAZING opportunities for people to work and have the worth of their existence validated in this way.
Sarah and Jodi have lived semi-independently in Adult Family Homes for the past 7 and 14 years respectively. They are now in their mid 30's and 40's and each have unique complications in addition to their Down Syndrome. Because of their increasing needs, their parents have chosen to arrange this housing model which provides more focused, one-on-one care and enables them to still live as independently as their abilities allow. They do need almost constant monitoring for health and safety and can't be left home alone. As their full time care-givers we do get time off and respite care - and have given a 2 year minimum commitment to this job/lifestyle.
We're doing something very different - my brave little family of three. We hope and pray that it is the good sort of different. We'd appreciate your thoughts and prayers as well! We have A LOT to learn. Caden is loving his new housemates and its a joy to watch him bond with Sarah and Jodi.
My prayer is that this "job" brings about the kind of "different" in us that makes our hearts bigger. The kind of adventure that makes us more grounded and content - regardless of where we are or who we are with. And the kind of work that knits us closer together as we learn to create a space that values vulnerability.
My hope is that this is a season in our lives that makes us more aware of our own needs for forgiveness, grace, and patience from others as we learn about living in this tension of giving and receiving love from our two new housemates.
More to come...
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